Email Insanity (Part 2)....

Email 7:



Todd,



If you are going to quote me - it would do you well to quote what was actually written. The email was from October 10th and the whole email was in regards to the sale of the house. I ended it with this paragraph, "As far as dealing with this divorce ourselves. I am done. From this point on - unless it has to do with Adam directly - point all issues to your lawyer and your lawyer will get in touch with mine; whom will then contact me." If you notice it is very specific that unless it has to do with Adam directly; which the visitation would be; to use the lawyers.



Do not tell me you attempted to work out a visitation schedule with me because it was in those emails you told me that this was the least of your concern and you would only deal with one issue at a time and that issue at that point in time was the sale of the house.



Please contact me after you have had your meeting with your lawyer in December and then we will discuss the visitation at that point.



Amy



Email 8:



Amy,



I don’t take the time to remember every word that you said to me. You’re not worth my time. The only think I remembered is that you hung up on me, saying that everything needed to go through your lawyer. So that’s what I did. Apparently that was the best decision anyway, because you are obviously NOT willing to compromise on any visitation arrangements.



I’m not sure what you are referring to in regards to a meeting with my lawyer in December. I do not have anything scheduled with her at that time.



I’m going to assume by your short email, that you are no longer interested in coming to a compromise concerning Adam’s Christmas break. I was more than willing to discuss you having Adam on the 23rd, as I do not want him to miss out on your family’s Christmas. That is obviously still an option if you want to discuss it.



-Todd



Email 9:



Todd,



I never told you to go through the lawyers and then hung up on you. I have done 99% of the communication with you via email since August.



You need to understand that having Adam on weekends do not mean more than my weeks. Christmas vacation is to be split evenly - and that does mean you will be giving up what has been going on; the weekends during the break he has. Do not tell me I am the one who is unwilling to compromise. You are saying to me that your time is still yours and you are not giving them up but the time I would normally have Adam I have to share. You are being very irrational over what equally split means. If you are unwilling to give up your time then I will consider just keeping the regular schedule. You would have him from 4 PM on the 21st until 8 AM on the 24th and then 4 PM on the 28th until 8 AM on the 31st. Then once school resumes you would pick him up for your overnight at 4 PM on the 7th until 8 AM on the 8th.



Todd you have been aware of when my families Christmas was going to be since our mediation in August. If you decided not to share that with your family - to be perfectly honest - it isn't my fault or problem.



Just because my lawyer asked you to submit what you wanted for visitation does not mean that is what was agreed upon. Nothing has been set in stone. As a matter of fact at this point in time there is no temporary or permanent order in place for visitation with Adam between us. We went through mediation and I have been following that but since you still don't agree to what was decided upon while we were there I am wondering why I am following that at all.


Well your lawyer let mine know she needed to meet with your mom in December to go over what went on in court in order to decide the next steps that needed to be taken (or something along those lines). I kind of got the idea that you would be involved with that process since it is you and I going through the divorce and not your mom and I.



After I have had time to sort through what is going on with all of this - I will get back to you. It probably won't be until next week though because of the holiday and not getting a response from Ken until he is back in the office.



-Amy



Todd,



On another note - I still do not know if you are willing to have me drop Adam off early on the morning of the 10th or not - you have not answered that for me. Also the week of the 11th if I am to be induced I need to know for sure if you are willing to have him there. I have to have this set so I know where each of the boys are going and when. I have started to work on other arraignments because your response was more like you are doing me a favor than you really wanting him there. So please let me know.



-Amy



Email 10:



Amy,



In mediation, you agreed to split the holiday vacation IN ADDITION TO our normal visitation schedule. It sounds to me as if you were not totally aware of exactly what we were talking about in mediation. Perhaps you should have conferred with your lawyer if you were confused. If you are now not willing to split the Christmas vacation with me, as you agreed to in mediation, then I will go ahead and take Adam on my normal weekends, in addition to Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, which are mine this year. I will pick him up on the 21st, and drop him back off on the morning of the 26th.



Since New Years is yours, and that is Monday night/Tuesday morning, then you will have Adam then anyway. Perhaps you and he can celebrate together the 1-year anniversary of the day you gave up on our marriage.



You will also have him on the first weekend of January (4,5,6), so I will pick him up on the 7th for my normal Monday.



Since you are unwilling to split the Christmas vacation time with me, then I expect to make that time up at some other time during the year. I will let you know in advance when there are approximately 5 days that I would like to have Adam.



Contrary to your belief, I have NOT been aware of your family Christmas schedule until the email that you just sent me this week. You MENTIONED in mediation that your family was going to do something prior to the actual Christmas holiday, but you also said that you weren’t sure of what was going on and that you would let me know. At the time, you indicated that it would probably be a SUNDAY, but you did not say whether it was going to be 1 week prior, 2 weeks prior, or anything certain at all. I’m not going to plan my schedule based on guesses and maybes. As far as I was concerned, I was waiting for you to figure out exactly what was going on.



I’m sorry that you waited so long, but that’s not really my problem. I tried to be nice and work with you to come up with a schedule that worked for both of us, but you are unwilling to do anything other than EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT. I was willing to compromise and work with you. You were only willing to DEMAND your schedule and would not budge.



For the record, I am still willing to come up with a compromise with you if you are still interested in having Adam with you and your family on Christmas. I do not want him to miss out on that.



As far as my lawyer meeting with my mother, I’m not sure where that information would have even come from. There is no meeting with my mother as far as I am aware. I’m not sure why there even would be.



I’m pretty sure I already answered your question about the 10th, 11th, etc... My answer was as follows:



*** As far as I know, that will be okay. You have him the weekend of the 7th, 8th, and 9th, which means I would have him on the 10 th anyway. I can just keep him for the week if that would be more convenient for you.



Of course I want him here. Why would you ever consider that I wouldn’t want him here? You know better than that. I am always happy to have Adam with me, regardless of the time or place. Ever since you left, I have done nothing but rearrange my schedule whenever I have had the chance to have Adam with me. I have put everything else in my life on hold in order to spend time with him. For you to even suggest that I wouldn’t want him here is just ignorant.



Email 11:



Todd,



Again I will get back to you about what the Christmas break schedule will be next week. I will be speaking with my lawyer about this issue when he returns to the office.



Just to confirm I will be dropping Adam off around 7:20 in the morning on December 10th and as soon as I hear from the doctors I will let you know about the rest of the week.



Plus Todd you have been aware of when my family holidays were to be - here are the emails to refresh your memory.



-Amy



(Email 3)


Todd,



Let me get this straight - before it was we could talk about nothing other than visitation and now it is we can talk about nothing other than the sale of the home?



I really wish you could decide upon what direction you would like to go in and then realize this isn't just about you and what you feel like talking about or doing.



I have let you know numerous time; I have given my numbers to Judy. I do not agree with the number you have given me and I am not going to say that I do. There were numerous things you left out. There is no way to determine what the final price is going to be. If you are not willing to go below a certain amount please get that to Judy with your top and low number. I have told her that I am willing to sell the house for what the market is dictating. It is a buyers market - not a sellers market right now. I personally am aware of that and would just like to get this house sold.



I asked you nicely to let me know about this holiday and you are unwilling to do that; in which was agreed upon in mediation. I have for over the 14 months let you see and take Adam all the time. I asked for financial help from you back in December - 4 months after we had been gone; with you offering nothing in that time for financial help. You told me you would try but would not agree to it. I have at this point only received 3 child support payments from you. I have given you more and more when it comes to the time you have with Adam and you have given nothing. Just so you understand and our lawyers; I am not willing to change the schedule giving you anymore time for visitation.



We have gone through mediation. During mediation we agreed upon a preliminary visitation. Since that time I have been abiding by that schedule. You were also supposed to get the information about your life insurance policy and retirement funds; neither have been done or handed over to my lawyer. We also agreed to sell the house; that is not happening either. You were supposed to get back to me regarding the list of things in the house; that has not happened either. You were also supposed to start paying child support; that has not happened either. So far Todd it is not me who has been difficult - it seems to be that you are the one who is stone walling the divorce process.



I have sat back and allowed you to dictate what we talk about and when. I am letting you know that isn't going to happen anymore.



We need to discuss this Christmas break schedule at this point in time. I have submitted a proposed time frame and asked for your input. Please get back to me like I requested. You are saying you have no time to discuss this schedule but you put plenty of time and thought into your reply to my email; in which had nothing to do with the Christmas schedule.



Amy



(Email 2)


On 10/9/07, Todd wrote:
Amy,



I am in the middle of trying to find a new house, so I can move out of this one and we can put this house on the market. I have been spending countless hours viewing houses and working with realtors. I really don't have the time to start talking about Christmas break.



I am expecting YOU and ME to come to an agreement on the terms of the sale of the house. I have asked you numerous times to discuss this with me, and you have denied me that. When you want to sit down like an adult and work out the details of the house, I am ready.



Until that time, I really don't have the time or energy to be discussing other things. One thing at a time please. Once the terms of the sale of the house are agreed upon, we can start talking about the visitation schedule. I have already submitted a proposed visitation schedule through the lawyers. You should have received a copy of it.



(Email 1)


On Behalf Of Amy PowersSent: Saturday, October 06, 2007 8:00 AMTo: Todd
Subject: Christmas Holiday...

Todd,



I know it is only October but I want to get the Christmas holiday scheduled with you now so that we know what is going on and I can get it on my calendar...



As was stated in mediation the Wetzel family is trying to do Christmas the Saturday prior to actual Christmas. So this year that would be on the 22nd...



Here is my proposal for the holiday:



I have Adam on:



December 22nd and 23rd instead of you picking him up from school on the 21st. That way will have him around for the Wetzel family and then the boys and I can celebrate the morning of the 23rd and my immediate family can do their Christmas with him on the evening of the 23rd.



You would pick him up the morning of the 24th and have him until Sunday morning the 30th.



I would get him from the 30th until about Noon of the 5th.



You would then have him around Noon on the 5th and take him to school on the morning of the 7th...



So Amy:



December - 22, 23, 30, 31
January 1, 2, 3, 4
with pick up in the early AM on the 24th and 30th and Noon on the 5th



So Todd:



December - 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29
January 5, 6, 7
with pick up in early AM on 24th and 30th and Noon on 5th



Please let me know as soon as you can.



Sorry if this is a bit jumbled - trying to get this typed up prior to heading to a funeral...



Amy



Email 12:



Amy,



As you will clearly note... We were in the middle of discussing the sale of the house and you sent me an email concerning visitation. I replied to you and requested that you keep our discussion on one topic.



What makes you think that I even took the time to read your email? I did not address anything in your email. I did not comment on anything you had to say. I got through the first sentence and quit reading when I realized that it was completely off-topic from what we were discussing at the time and I quickly hit reply and told you that I was expecting to keep the topic of discussion on the house.



As far as I know the email that you quoted below could have simply been manufactured by you here today. I’ve never read any more than the first sentence before. You could have just made the rest of it up today.



I will be happy to have Adam on the week of the 10th. I will plan for it.



FYI: If you are unwilling to honor the schedule that we defined in mediation, then I am going to have to request that we go back to our original visitation schedule where I have him on the weekends from Friday afternoon through Monday morning, and you have him the remainder of the time. The only reason I agreed to give up one weekend a month was because I would be getting that time back at other times throughout the year. One of the two weeks during Christmas break was part of that time.