Frustration

My life seems to run in circle. I try to not be frustrated with the way things go but it is hard not to be.

I have so many things going on right now that I get overwhelmed with getting anything complete.

I have finally got all the information I need for the application for the Section 8 Housing. Does not mean I will be approved or even make it off the waiting list prior to moving next year. Yet I at least have it filled out and ready to be turned in. Of course they are not open today but still - it is ready for tomorrow.

I called Michigan Department of Human Services to let them know my rent is going up and child support went down. Of course they are closed today as well so I left a message with my case worker. We will see what happens. I just need to know where to send the new and improved information or if I have to fill out a whole new application. I am hoping I can just send a copy of the new rental agreement and not have to fill the whole thing of paperwork out again.

I finally got an email from Keith. This would be Kyle's dad. Now back when I was in the hospital he moved to the Philippians. I sent him a message asking for him information; as in address and phone and had not heard back from him. I finally got a message back today letting me know he is home, living with his mom and dad again and without a job. Well don't rush to contact your son. I mean he is only your son. I guess I just know how to pick the right men to be fathers!

Had to work on filling out paperwork for Adam for his Free/Reduced lunch program. Apparently the state randomly picks so many children from each school district each year to make sure they are telling the truth about their income. So then you have to go through this whole verification process. Well I turned it all in when I filled out the papers; like I do each year. The State happened to pick Adam this year and the school can not find the paperwork I submitted at the beginning of the year. So that means - I have to get it all from each agency AND have it to them by the 15th of this month. I have been trying but don't have the exact stuff they need. So I would like to scream because Adam and Kyle could potentially lose this program because I don't have the proper paperwork to turn in.

What else is there going on that is frustrating. The whole court process. I have a letter I need to send to Friend of the Court about the whole Todd situation. I need to get that in the mail by tomorrow. (please pray my printer has enough ink in it to print it out the right way) I have the letter done but for some reason I am just worried I didn't say enough or said to much. I am not sure to be honest. I have huge concerns with Todd right now. He is saying he wants Adam more than 50% of the time and yet he is claiming at the same time he can't work because of how ill he is. Okay - so why in the heck is he driving with Adam then? If his illness is progress that quickly - how is he caring for Adam? I am worried. Maybe I need to ask for supervised visitations at this point. Maybe that is an over-reaction. I just don't know.

Then there is the SI I applied for with the boys. I know I am probably just over-reacting here but she said if I didn't have a check by the 10th then they are probable denied. Okay so it is a holiday for the government this weekend/today because of Veterans day. Yet it is the 12th and there has been nothing from anyone so far. So I have $2.88 in my bank account, very little food, no gas in the car and a $300 script I need to get next week (or I will probably end up in the hospital again). So because most things do not work the way I hope for - I am going to just call it good and say they didn't get it. That way when the denial letter does come - I don't have so much disappointment.

So there is most of my frustration right now. It does not fully cover it all but I am pretty sure you have a good idea as to what is going on in my life. I keep on saying it has to get better but to be honest - I am not so sure I really believe that at all.