Sorrow

I know Kyle and my relationship did not become this way overnight and I know it won't get better overnight either. Yet each day he pushes more and more and I break. I end up yelling at him.

He is rude, he is disrespectful, he refuses to do anything that is asked of him and getting him to do his consequence is next to impossible.

I am in tears every day for many reasons. Partly because I know I brought this on myself. I treated him so badly. He and I are very much alike and in turn we butt heads... I am pulling my hair out and I do not know how long I can take this.

To be honest this is just one of many things that are bringing me to this point.

The insurance issue, the dealing with my husband who believes and twists reality, the car breaking down left and right, the lack of apartment, the many other broken relationships in my life and so many other things. It is just one thing after another.

I have a friend who is dealing with a lot of stuff and I am struggling with just listening. I don't want to give her advice because my advice is very tainted right now. I am very upset with her husband though and his double standard. They have both been friends of mine for a long time now but the whole thing is - looking in; I am really sad by watching it. I hate seeing the possibility of them going through the same thing I am going through right now and I can see it happening. Not tomorrow but - give it some time. I would venture a guess though that if things do not change; within about 6 years she would find a way to make it on her own. It makes me really, really sad...

I have to get going. If you read this please pray - I go see my PDoc tonight.