Fears

Today was full of emotions. We went to Paul and Lisa's for the day. We went early so I could get some things done. I started to get worried because he had not touched our joint account and no one had heard from him as far as I knew. I called Julie and Joerg and they called all three of our phone numbers and left a message because he did not answer. Then I called the police to have them go and check on him. They called back to say he was out mowing the lawn and fine. Then I called Julie back and he was calling Joerg at the same time. He said something about if she wants to talk to me she needs to call me herself or if she wants to know how I am she needs to call me herself. Basically it came down to I needed to call him. So then I was upset because he seems to not care. It was frustrating. I went from one extreme to the next extreme.

When I got to Lisa's today I lost it. First time I really cried over all this. I mean I cried the first night with the boys but today it hit so hard. In less than a year I might be single and I do not want to be. I want my husband to see this is a big deal and we do need help.I want my husband. I want my marriage.

Lord I bring my marriage before you now. You are an awesome Lord. You created the heavens and earth. you sent Your only Son to this earth to die for my sins. Lord You can make miracles happen. Please bring our family back together. I do not want my children to suffer for their parents sin. I believe my marriage can work just as I believe in Your love and forgiveness. In Your name - Amen.

Todd I love you. I do not want this to end but I can not go on like this. I am pleading for help to be gotten. This is no longer in my hands - it is in yours and the Lords. I love you - Amy Lee